my life is average

Today I slapped a Twilight fan. MLIA.


Today, my sister and I were hungry so we went through the Mcdonalds drive through. I drive a rather old beat up car, and as we pulled up to the window to get our food the worker looked at me and sarcastically said "Nice car." Without missing a beat my 11 year old sister leans over the seat and said "Nice job." That shut him up. MLIA


Today, I was cleaning out some old writings I had and found an essay I wrote back when I was in the fifth grade. The subject was to create a new piece of technology that could better our life; I wrote about a pocket-sized boom box you could carry with you anywhere, and you can download and store all of your songs on it. This was five years before the iPod came out. I demand compensation. MLIA


Today, I spent an hour petting my dog. It was only when I turned on the light that I realized it had been a pillow. MLIA.


Today my best friend and I discovered that the handicap stall in our school's bathroom has two toilets. Needless to say, it made my day. It was even better when I sent a picture to one of my guy friends and he texted back asking if that is really how the stalls in girls bathrooms are. I said: Of course, why do you think we go to the bathroom in groups. He believed me. MLIA


Today, my mom used a "your mom" joke on me. MLIA


Today is superhero day at my school. A kid in my class dressed up as Jesus. MLIA.


Today, my sister and I were at a ballet performance.While we were there we ran into a little girl with a Disney princess sticker on, so my sister asked her "awww do you like Disney princesses?" The little girl barked back NO, ripped the sticker off, and ate it. MLIA

MyLifeIsAverage

Sometimes I wish I had something great to put on this website...

Today we started our new trimester. A boy who I know from swimming, that I didn't know goes to my school, was assigned to sit next to me. When he put his stuff down he looked over at me and said, "Oh hey! I didn't notice it was you with all your clothes on!" The looks on the other kids' faces were priceless. I just winked at him and then looked towards the front of the room. The faces got even better. MLIA.


Today, I convinced half of my English class that William Shakespeare wrote The Titanic. MLIA.


Today, my cat turned away from me, brought his paw relatively close to his face, and proceeded to sneeze. I guess cats are aware of H1N1, too. MLIA.


Today, I was sewing up a hole in my pants while my mom was in my room. The needle got stuck when I tried to push it through. Not thinking, I yelled, "Get out of my pants!" Without missing a beat, my mom said, "Just remember that on your first date."


Today I was at the mall and walked by Aeropostale. I saw the mannequins dressed in new winter attire for Christmas. There was one little boy mannequin and i thought to myself when did Aeropostale start selling kids clothing. The little boy mannequin winked at me and continued posing to trick other shoppers. MLIA.


Today in History, I got a detention for saying a curse word in class. What word did I say for me to deserve this? Voldemort. MLIA